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This week brings a refocus on the central theme of this blog: What are the multiple reasons that well-educated people have better marriages relative to the general population?They do not leave their futures—including their marriages—up to chance, but instead proceed through life in a very intentional manner. According to this infographic from Wedding Paper Divas, 40 percent of couples wait 13 to 18 months between "Yes!Because it felt important and timely, I deviated last week from my central topic to write a short piece on deceptive marketing practices affecting untold numbers of returning Veterans with G. In addition to being a highly accomplished group, well-educated people are thoughtful planners and strategists.Courtship is the systematic process that one undergoes in order to ensure compatibility with a lifelong partner.Walters Art Museum Courtship is the period in a couple's relationship which precedes their engagement and marriage, or establishment of an agreed relationship of a more enduring kind.Alexandra Campos, of The National Wedding Show, which carried out the poll said: "Men everywhere should be getting ready to buy that ring and get down on one knee if they are anywhere near the three-year anniversary."If you really want to earn some brownie points, you could pop the question a few months earlier, as this research shows that's when women think it's the perfect time to get engaged." The poll of 3,000 engaged or married Brits also revealed that one in ten has even set a time limit on when they get engaged.
Whirlwind romances may not be to everyone's taste, but it seems boyfriends who are approaching their third "anniversary" are overdue for the ultimate romantic gesture.
I suppose the relatively high average age of marriage in the sample would explain a curious personal experience that I once had that has never been repeated at other weddings I’ve attended.
When I give talks on how to make wise decisions about love relationships, the burning question that someone almost always asks is, “How long do I have to wait?
Recall Walter Mischel's marshmallow study which showed the value of the ability to delay gratification.* Mischel offered a group of four year-old children one large, puffy marshmallow but told them all that if they would wait for him to run an errand, they could have not one, but two, lovely marshmallows.
Some of the four-year-olds were able to control their impulse to snatch up and consume their marshmallows for the duration of Mischel’s 15–20-minute errand (which must have felt like several lifetimes for these four-year-olds). Mischel followed up with his subjects many years later and found that the ability to control impulses and delay gratification was associated with success in many different areas of life as an adult.